“How do you ever sleep again, once your spouse has
suffered a heart attack and is now home with you? I feel so responsible for his
wellbeing, now that he is lying here with me… no nurse, no call button no
machine monitoring all aspects of wellbeing, no sense of security that a
hospital offers. I’m just not sure I will sleep, or as soundly as I’d like.
:::sigh:::” ANH
What a profound statement. This was the reaction of a friend
when her husband came home from the hospital after suffering a heart attack.
When I read this, it really hit me. How do you ever sleep again? In an instant, your whole world has
changed forever.
BREATHE!
Sometimes life doesn’t go as we planned. A heart attack, a
loss of a loved one, a disability. These can all be devastating. You feel
paralyzed Why is this happening? A million thoughts go through your head.
What if this happens? What if that happens? How am I going to get through this?
BREATHE!
Take a few minute to just sit and collect your thoughts. Write
down what you are thinking. Make a list of questions you have for the medical
professionals. Talk to the doctors, the nurses, the therapists. Talk to others
who have been through it. They can give
you a been there done that perspective on things. Gather as much information as
you can from anywhere you can. You can do this!
BREATHE!
There is a saying, “You never know
what you can do unless you have to do it.” You have to find a way to get
through this. This is your “new normal”. Create a support system to lean on and
use it. You will be surprised how many people are willing to help. Things will
be okay. You got this.
BREATHE!
In my case, I was born in 1966. My mother was 43 and my father
was 46. This was considered old to have a baby at the time. My father was mad
at himself because he didn’t think that my mother needed to be pregnant at the
time. My mother was concerned about her own health and my health as well.
For one of my college classes, I had to write an
autobiography. This was a great experience for me. Being the youngest of five
ranging in age from birth to twenty - three at the time I was born, I was able
to get insight from them, as well as my parents.
My two older siblings were in seminary and college at the
time I was born. My brother in seminary expressed concern for both of my parent
wondering how they would be able to handle the pregnancy given our parents
ages. When I was born, it was discovered I had Spina Bifida. This was
devastating news to my whole family. What now?
BREATH!
At the time of my birth, the medical community was still
working on developing treatments for infants born with Spina Bifida. I was born
with the normal complications of Spina Bifida, open spine, bowel and bladder
incontinence, orthopedic problems. In addition to these issues, I was also born
with hydrocephalus (build-up of cerebral spinal fluid in my skull). This issue does
not affect every child born with Spina Bifida.
Things were touch and go for quite a while. I was in pretty
bad shape. I had spine surgery almost immediately after I was born, I had a
shunt placed in my head to control the hydrocephalus. This had to be replaced a
few days after it was placed due to a malfunction. I even stopped breathing
once. I was told a member of the medical staff had to perform CPR on me.
Things in life don’t always go as we planned, but there is
always a way to get through them. Family, friend, loved ones and of course
faith in God will always see you through the dark times. Just step back, take it
all in. Things will be okay.
BREATHE!
I followed up with my friend about her husband’s condition.
She told me that he has some degree of depression and anxiety. The doctor said
this is normal for what he (they) have gone through. She also said that this
has been a life altering experience, but they are getting through it. Amen.
